narcissus, on kissing

by jayy dodd

 

i have learned                 to reject

every boy           i’ve ever wanted

on the mouth. no-          body is impossible

but mine is fucking close to fantastic.          i imagine loving me

is being shackled           in the cargo            of a dreamboat.

beside you          rages the quietest frictions.

every inch hurts, no, is heavy, no, this is not about kissing anymore,

sorry. i have learned to believe i kiss better in my head.

sorry my mouth               used      to not taste

so coffee-tar,      stale-beer swallowing

tongue still licks              like it should.

i want every-man’s collar             stained with the gloss-

smack memory                my lip-shape— a body, too.